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Author: mark

What’s Next?

“What’s next?” I ask myself. A week long reflection in March turned into six months. My life didn’t proceed the way I hoped no did it develop into something unexpectedly good. It has been a disappointing journey. If I died today, I would be dis-satisfied with the collection of moments and impacts I made. I could have given more. I could have experienced life more. I focused on dreams not my own and remained in the comfort zone of normalcy instead. It upsets me that I squandered this gift of life. I am blessed with a number of advantages not provided to others. I have a loving mother. My brothers have been good to me. My family provided a safety net every time I fell. I didn’t appreciate what I had and focused on what I didn’t have. I focused on what was hurting and tearing me me down. I think that’s why it bothers me so much. There are so many people who started with so little that accomplished so much. This is my one and only life. It is mine and no one else’s. I can no longer live under the shadow of someone else’s dream or the weight of their expectations. I need see how far forward I can move my life in the direction and manner I want. I want to see what kind of...

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